Child Discipline (1)

The Apostle Paul said in Ephesians 6:4, “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” The Greek word translated ‘nurture’ is translated 4 of its 6 appearances with the word ‘chasten’ or ‘chastisement.’ (Hebrews 12:5,7,8,11) Thus Paul is admonishing parents, especially fathers, to raise their children in the chastening and encouraging instruction of the Lord. Together, these make up child discipline, or disciple making.
Why does he mention chastening before instruction? It is not because children are to be chastised before they know what is expected of them. Instead, it might be because a child will not be instructed until he is listening and often the sin nature is hindering that readiness to listen.
It isn’t long after bringing our little bundle of joy into the world that we realize our baby may not have inherited his mother’s eyes or his father’s nose, but he surely did inherit, without exception, his parents’ sin nature! At too early an age, the child is ready to take on full grown adults, twice his height and 10 times his weight, for the number one place of authority in his life. You have to at least give them credit for bravery!
We have all been in a store and seen a parent capitulate to her child in order to bring about temporary peace. I heard the story of a 12 year-old boy who ruled his mother by threatening to undress in public if she didn’t give him his way in everything. Ask me how that one came out! When I witness such, I pity the parent and the child. That pattern, if left unchecked, will bring deep pain and suffering to both of them in years to come.
Of course, each child is different and some are much more compliant than others. The good news is that, those children who constantly challenge the rules are often the most successful if that challenge is met with a clear understanding of where the boundary ends.
The first task of a father, then, is to discern if his child is really rebelling against his authority. If he (or she) is, then here is a biblical perspective on that challenge. This is not a choice between immediate peace or conflict. It is a battle for the soul of your children. After all, proper discipline may save his soul from hell! (Prov. 23:14) This is a battle between you and the devil for God’s heritage that has been entrusted to you. You have the encouragement of the Father, the power of the resurrected Christ, the wisdom of the Scripture, and the fear of the consequence to motivate you to win it. You simple must win!
Next week we will look at a specific strategy to accomplish the victory!